Posts from — July 2005

3 things that make you happy:

vacations
sound of crickets on a hot sunny day
starting an art project

2 things you looking forward to today:

mentoring tonight
taking some photos

2 long term things you looking forward to:

our stone house with a porch and a double studio
art as life

1 person you are going to appreciate:

Marly

From: 3things2thing.blogspot

Like

Unlike

Sometimes I wish I could just leave my mouth shut or sleep so that I’m not talking. Nightmares last night, horrible sleep, bad night last night. Not the best end to a decent weekend. I don’t know what I’m doing, where I’m going. Do I need to reconsider everything that I’ve thought was true about myself and about other people? Am I just overanalyzing everything. Am I just being paranoid? This is a rambling post. I just want this peace and comfort and belonging and security that I always crave and rarely feel. And I want to stop saying things that make me feel regret and guilt. It’s such a horrible feeling. I worry that I am just destroying everything good and that it will always be this way. Drama life. I wonder if other animals get lonely?

Like

Unlike

Stomach is churning and my eyes want to close.
Regret, guilt, and nerves wrapped in a package of torture.
I sigh to myself again and again – my idea of relaxed breathing?
Would love to curl up and stay inside myself for the next month or two.

Currently…
Listening to: Beth Orton
In the car – book on tape: Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro
Reading: the paper and Deepsix still… (good book by the way)

Also, start mentoring a new girl today and am feeling extremely nervous and excited. I hope it works out well! Looking forward to it!
___________________________________________________
____________________________________________________

From Don’t Need a Reason by Beth Orton:

I think I’ve seen a sign
But its a very fine line
If you want it all
And don’t lose track
For upon our backs
There’s no weight of wings

When they shine is hard to say
But some things never fade away

We only hurt the ones we love
Why, we don’t need a reason
We only give what we think we deserve
And that’s something to believe in

So I’ve been calling angels down to Earth
And I don’t need a reason
Calling angels down to Earth
Because I believe we need them

Like

Unlike

Realizing the gravity of the situation, considering the fact that they were losing their basketball match for freedom from the Paper Weight, Wallace rested while Erastly debated walking away from it all and resigning at the bottom of the weight.

Like

Unlike

Pretty day with a gloomy sky and red on my mind. Colors and shadows lingering on my eyes. Feeling so tired today. Hate days like that when my eyes just keep closing and all I can think about is resting my eyes – and it’s not even 5:00.

Like

Unlike